I eat

179. I’ve lost three pounds this week. Here’s what I’m doing: I eat in front of the TV and I lose weight. I eat late at night and I lose weight. I eat in a hurry and I lose weight. I eat standing up and I lose weight. I eat mindlessly in front of the computer at work, not stopping until I’ve eaten all the food in front of me and I lose weight. I eat 3 meals a day with a few handfuls of almonds and/or a piece of cheese and I lose weight. I eat apples and I lose weight. I eat a lot and I lose weight. I eat a little and I lose weight.

Here’s what I’m not doing: I’m not starving and desperately trying to wait until at least 12:00 noon to eat my lunch at work because I know if I eat it at 10:30am when I actually become ravenously hungry (even though I waited to eat breakfast until 9:00am) I’ll be super ravenously hungry by 1:00pm and I just didn’t pack that much food, so I’ll probably dig into the candy dish or better yet run somewhere and get a sandwich, which I’ll only eat half of because I don’t want to eat too much and be the lazy glutton that everyone thinks I am just because I’m fat. Do I sound bitter?

I’m almost finished with GCBC; finally I’m on the last chapter. Gary Taubes has a great Op-Ed piece on the whole Vytorin blowup in the NYTimes.  Of course NYT’s Health section totally found doctors who defended Vytorin and were taking it themselves. After reading that article, and GCBC with all the doctors who don’t understand the implications of their own research, I realize I should have gone to medical school. Apparently you don’t have to be that bright.

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January 28, 2008. diet routine, Gary Taubes, weight loss. Leave a comment.

Melt

180

Not long ago I was thinking “If I can just get to 175 again, back to my New York weight, when I walked everywhere, I’ll be happy with that.” Not any more. I’m already 5lbs away from that.

I struggled to get back there for 4 years with all kinds of insane exercise regimes. Cathe’s Boot Camp 4 days a week and biking and walking all at the same time. I would have done Biggest Loser proud. Nothing. Now I’m almost there in 20 days. That’s 3/4 of a pound a day. Do I doubt I’ll be in the 170s by Saturday? I would be shocked if I weren’t at least 179.

So that goal weight of 175 seems silly now.  Should the new goal be 150, 25lbs less and 20lbs lighter than I’ve ever been?  Even if the current rate slows by half, I’d reach that goal by the end of March. So 130 by June? I have no idea what I’ll look or feel like at either 150 or 130; I’ve never weighed that little.

It’s like a weird experiment. If I just keep going will I just keep losing? How low can I go? When I started this, I said I would have a piece of cake on my birthday. I’m not sure I will.

January 24, 2008. goals, weight, wonder. Leave a comment.

What are you weighting for?

I weigh 182 pounds. I haven’t weighed this little in about 4 years. I’ve lost 13lbs in 17 days by cutting out most carbohydrates from, and adding fat to, my diet.

I’ve never been diet crazy. I am not one of those people who’s been on every diet under the sun. In fact I’ve only been on Weight Watchers, which I think is the most sensible low fat, low calorie diet plan out there. In the past 18 years I’ve joined WW half a dozen times. Two of those times I lost 50+ pounds. Unfortunately they were the same 50lbs. I would lose that much weight, then stall around 175. My goal weight was always 25-40lbs away. I would keep the weight I had lost off for 2 or 3 years then it would come back.

When I moved to Austin 5 years ago without a job and not knowing anyone, I gained 40lbs in 6 months topping out at about 220. I decided dieting was insane (doing something over and over and expecting a different result). I consciously chose not to diet, but work on just doing what I wanted to do anyway and accepting myself as I am. My barely subconscious goal was to lose weight by exercising. Biking, running, swimming, karate, scuba diving, yoga. I wanted to be as active as possible to take off the pounds. I also stopped eating at the fastest of the fast foods like McDonalds. I lost 20lbs. In three years.

I’m not very good at this blogging thing: I didn’t weight myself or take measurements the first day. I weigh myself erratically. Although I’m starting to weigh myself on Saturdays. That seems like a good day. I’m not following any specific book, not Atkins, not the Zone, not whatever else is out there. I don’t want to follow random rules for the rest of my life. I’m just eating meat, fish, eggs, cheese/dairy, vegetables and fats. Butter is good. I just added fruit back into the mix a few days ago. When I lose more weight I’ll try to add whole grains back into my diet. A life without bread seems kind of sad. Especially since I make amazing bread. And a life without sugar… too bad I went to pastry school.

January 14, 2008. diet, fat acceptance, Uncategorized, weight. Leave a comment.